Spending time with kids brings a sense of balance to our lives. It reminds us that the best things in life aren't things. Instead, the magic of life is revealed by the interactions we have with others, particularly those we love. In my opinion, kids, more than anyone else, enable us to be touched by life. I have learned more about life from being a dad than from anything else. p11
I never regret a single moment of the time I spend with my kids. I also know that when my kids are grown ups - only a few more years from now - I'll never regret the time that I spent with them, and I'm sure I'll wish I'd had more. And when you do, remind yourself of the gifts they bring to your life. I've never met a man who wasn't happy to have made this decision. I hope you'll make it too. p13
If you can see the value in becoming a little less serious - for yourself and those around you - then you have it in you to do so. Instead of waiting until the end of you life to have a change of heart, make that effort now. You'll be glad you did. p18
A sense of humor does many things. Not only does it make you feel less tense and anxious, but it gives you better judgment as well. Rather than being bogged down with seriousness, you're able to rise above the cloud and see things more clearly. p26
I love acronyms, and the word "golf" is one of the best I've ever come across. If you put together the letters G-O-L-F, what you come up with is this: Gift Of Life Forever. If you could only remember what a gift life is, we'd surely be happier, and we wouldn't be sweating the small stuff. At least not as often. p30
Patience is a virtue in both golf and in life. It's interesting to observe a good golfer eyeing his next shot. He take his time and absorbs the totality of his environment. He waits until he is ready to take his shot. So, too, in life. Living effectively involves plenty of patience. When we are patient, opportunities present themselves and solutions tend to surface. p31
Remember that when you send a little time taking care of yourself physically, emotionally and spiritually, you become a deeper, kinder person. You become less reactive and more patient. You develop your compassion, kindness, generosity. So that when you're with your spouse or girlfriend, children, friends, and coworkers, you'll be easier to be around - and more fun, too. p34
A calm mind is clever, creative, effective, and resourceful. Following every negative train of thought that enters your mind is stressful. Stay on board, and your life will more manageable and less exhausting. You'll have more energy for the fun things - like boating, perhaps! p37
I've found it really helpful to see life - especially the hassles and irritations - as a series of tests. Somehow, it puts things into better perspective, allowing me to keep my patience, see the bigger pictures, and let things go more easily. I hope you'll give this simple suggestion a try - you'll be glad you did. p39
Consider how you would respond to the following two sentences spoken by a spouse, lover, or friend. First, "I hate my stupid job: it sucks." Or, "Do you know that I'd really love to be doing?" Wow - what a difference. In the first sentence, you, as the listener or receiver of the compliant, want to leave the room. Your instinct is to pull away. In the second, however, you want to hear more; you want to engage in the conversation because it brings you closer to the person who is sharing. p45
Keeping things such as problems, hassles, and inconveniences in perspective is a gift. It helps you avoid unnecessary stress and heartache. The key to getting started is take a step back and try to see the bigger picture. Ask yourself, "In the scheme of things, does this really matter?" Sometimes it does matter. But often it doesn't. I think you'll find that the slightest shift in perspective will result in a tremendous amount of inner peace. By keeping small things small - and saving your reactions for the truly bigger things - you'll spend less time being upset and more time enjoying life. p54
Unfortunately, when you're busy comparing one person to another or one experience to something else, you often miss out on what's right before you. Likewise, when you break the comparison habit, or at least lessen its grip on the way you see the world, you'll begin to notice that life really is a magical adventure. Each experience is unique an worthy just the way it is. p71
One of the keys to being an effective public speaker is to be able to read your audience. In a nutshell, this means that if your audience is receptive to what you're saying continue on the same track; if not, you make adjustments. You're constantly checking in with the people you're speaking to - making sure your message is being accepted in the manner which it is intended. Reading your audience also enables you to know when it's time to repeat a major point you are making, as well as when it's time to quit. p96
Ironically, however, when you learn to have conflict - without it having you - you'll end up getting your way, even more than before. Because you'll have a more open, receptive mind, you'll see solutions where others see only problems. Furthermore, because you'll come across as less adversarial, others will be more open to your point of view. You'll discover new ways to resolve your conflicts, all the while maintaining your peace of mind. p101
It's all a matter of where you direct your attention. Do you focus on the hundreds of irritants in the world because they are there or do you focus instead on the small percentage of life that suits you? By making this simple shift in attitude, you're going to change the way you feel about many aspects of life. p107
Memorize the words, "There is no such thing as bad weather - only different kind of good weather" p138
As you extend your acceptance of the weather into other area of you life, you'll observe a noticeable change in the way you feel. Acceptance reduce pressure and anxiety. As you embrace what's going on in life instead of demanding that it be somehow different, you'll spend far less time being frustrated because you'll be so much more open, accepting and interested in what's really going on. p140
Often, when someone is mad at me, I attempt to implement this strategy. Rather than trying to explain myself, which often compounds or exacerbates a problem, I allow the person to vent their frustration. Usually, that's all it takes. In fact, the less effort, the better. Ironically, your well-intended actions can backfire. By allowing relationship to unfold, in their own time and in their own way, a magical connection has a chance to develop. What I've learned is that, in these instances, less effort is usually better. Rather than struggle for an answer, make one up, or pretend I have one. p145
Being present is one of the most talked-about mental dynamics in spiritual life, and, I believe, may be the single most important concept of living if your goal is to be happy and effective. In the absence of being present, you live in a world of fear, anticipation, regret, anxiety, and stress. Your mind takes you back into the past, reminding you of painful times, and your world of troubles, as well as off into the future, encouraging you to worry and fret. p159
If you start paying attention to your feelings, you might be surprised at what they are trying to tell you. If you're feeling stressed, it means you're having stressful thoughts. If you're feeling resentful or overwhelmed, it suggests you're having those kinds of thoughts, and so forth. By making the connection between the feelings you experience and the stress you're feeling, you can make some mental adjustments that can ease the problem. p165
Most of us have times when we treat small stuff like it's really big stuff. From my perspective, the more often we catch ourselves doing so, the better off we will be. By treating actual emergencies as emergencies and everything else as non-emergencies, we will be less inclined to sweat the small stuff - and we will live happier and more effective lives. p173
I once heard a good definition of insanity - when you keep doing the exact same thing and expect a different result. In a nutshell, that's what hindsight is all about: to keep you from doing the same things and expecting different results. p188
Diversifying your life doesn't have to be a big deal. It might mean starting to read a book on a new subject occasionally or taking a class just for fun rather than "to improve" yourself. It could involve spending time with new people, becoming involved in a new course, or engaging in a new activity. p192
The first step in finding a solution is identifying the problem. Take an honest look at your life and the number of activities you are involved with. If a vacation is appropriate, take it and have a great time. In addition, however, why not consider the possibility that needing a vacation may not be the real problem? An adjustment in lifestyle might be the real solution. The simple realization may help you bring the sanity back to your life. It did for me. p211
The truth is, we don't have to do "great things" to make a difference, only small things. By taking small steps and actions, our lives can become instrumentals of love and compassion.
Every day we are given hundreds of opportunities to practice compassion in action. We can learn to be less reactive and live with more patience. We can smile when others are serious.
The more compassion that enters your heart, the happier and more peaceful you will become. By knowing that you are doing your part to create a better world - whatever from that takes- you will fill any void that exists in your life, and you will begin to find the peace you are looking for. p221
The act of slowing down from the inside enables us to respond to the event around us, rather than reacting quickly and habitually. Reminding ourselves, again and again, that life isn't emergency - it only seems that way sometimes - help us to see things more clearly. Slowing down and taking deep breaths has the effect of allowing us to see things as they really are, instead of as we imagine they are. It takes away that sense of urgency and that need to fight back that so often occurs when you're tense. p231
I can't think of any downsize to giving compliments. It's easy to do, it helps your relationships, make others feel good, and contributes to your own sense of joy. Giving compliments is a great way to make your life and the life of others, just a little bit better. p233
It's important to remember, if you want a fulfilling life, that time has a way of passing us by. One day flows into the next, which becomes a week, than a month, a year, ten years, and so on. The next thing you know, you're saying, What happened all the time?
What I've learned is that the easiest way to avoid regrets is to ask myself the question, "If not now, when?" It's a powerful way to put life and our decisions about how we spend our time into perspective. p268
The truth is, none of us knows how long we have on this planet. May you have fifty more years - or maybe it's fifty days. Who knows? I certainly don't. Every day, I use the fact that I don't know how long I have to live to enhance the quality of my life. I remind myself of what's really important in life, and try to back that up with actions and the way I prioritize things. p270
Don't Sweat the Small Stuff for Men★★★★(CARLSON Richard, HyperionBooks, 2001.09.01) Sep 17, 2021
Zack's Comment
How many times I have to regret for what I did?
How many years do I have to wait to be a mature person?
How long do I wait to be a rich that I expected?
The truth is, there are too many ways to live more effective and reduce the stress for small things. I'm trying to realize for the reason why I focus on things that cannot be controlled by myself. Let it be if I cannot control. It could be a wisdom in order to avoid unnecessary stress and circumstances..
Don't sweat the small stuff for your life. Yes, let's do this.
As per above highlighted comments for living a ordinary life from this book, I will keep them in mind from time to time when I lost my way of this planet until end of time for my life.
